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Let me tell my story. After my story if you would like to proceed with yours that's fine or if not then that's fine to you're jist not quite ready and that's okay too. But just remember it's never to late to proceed to recovery!!! And these are stories my own mother doesn't know about... but I'm just at the beginning and nervous as hell.... first let me start by when I was with my ex boyfriend I thought it was awesome to smoke weed and do pills growing up during school it was awesome to sneak off out of class with friends to go to what I thought was wonderful which was pills... Gosh my heart is racing as I grow up I was not brought up around these pills it was what I thought were my friends that were feeding them to me telling me Oh it's just an Adderall you'll be okay it will mail you out I was just this it's just that so I fed into it and I continue to just eat them and they don't mean you don't one night we were having a party at my old roommates house drinking all kinds of alcohol popping all kinds of pills smoking all kinds of weed seen this guy he look like a bad boy and I wasn't too bad boys at the time pants kind of sagging baggy shirt send them fight someone so I thought he was tough when all reality the other person did not even fight back I knew he was on dope I thought that was awesome at the time. I was all messed up drugged out drunk we go downstairs and my roommate followed behind minutes after to see us doing our thing I'm not happy about it but I will not regret it due to me having a beautiful son that might know husband will be adopting... Months go by everyone finds out I'm pregnant everyone says he thinks he belongs to of course I still think it's on awesome feeling to do them pills I would do anything to have a methadone a Xanax Percocet Vicodin anything not knowing I was pregnant at the time of doing them pills I quit when I became pregnant though I was the best thing for my son after delivery they give me Percocet so I go back down hill they blame me and not wanting to be around my son due to some sort of depression shit but in all reality it was the drugs that I was doing behind everyone's back them drugs maybe do some stupid shit all I went downhill for a little bit before I met my now-husband I turn my life around real quick whenever we got back together he was the love of my life all the way back from 6th grade 12 years old and Miss Hatcher's class LOL anyway back to my story about drugs and addictions I turn my life around when we got together then again I became pregnant and again I fell back down hill due to me having a uterus infection for like 3 months he just kept wanting to feel any pain pill after pain pill but I did it the right way at first I took it the right way at first that I kept telling myself I was in pain and when all reality I really wasn't I just needed that pain pill so I can feel that pain of high again same thing I realize what I was doing so I quit those was the easiest thing for me to have her quit I had my daughter I didn't even barely take my pain medicine and she came all natural no epidural and now anything she even came with the police escort I'm sure you all will hear about that soon enough let's go down the road and I meet up with my friend Laura are kids happen to go to the same Headstart together we ended up actually becoming Neighbors or been neighbors and not knowing it we started hanging out with the same group of guys nothing sexually was ever done I put that on everything I love but drugs were involved it was mainly weed but this weed it got you high to no end it was the best feeling ever so I would keep going back because the high was so great and I just felt like it kept getting better and better come to find out the person was try for a few days so that made me go very insane so I had to find weed somewhere else but that weed was not giving me the high that I was feeling my daughter ended up being sick I had to take her to the hospital and my mindset was on that high I wasn't the best mom at that time and it takes a lot for me to even type this all out without tearing up and wanting to cry because I feel like such a piece of shit but in all reality I know I am not because I stepped up I'm letting people know who I am and who I was I'm stepping up I'm stepping out to let people know that I had an addiction to laced weed not by my choice this isn't a group to get you to stop smoking weed this is a group to tell your story mine happens to be released weed and pills I'm sorry Mom I have let you down I'm sorry babe I have let you down but just know I love you both very very much and will soon for all I am very very deeply sorry to all four of my beautiful children I feel like I have let everyone down and in all reality trying to find myself I was looking for everyone to find me so I turned to drugs because I couldn't pass out my addiction at that given time and I just kept running back to it now it is your time to voice yours or if you're not ready that's fine then you're not ready just remember I am here for you I will always be here for you no matter of the time just as long as I have some beauty sleep guess I will stop here this is the longest post I have ever written in my life and I hope that somebody really does take the time out to read for everyone that reads this I want you to like and comment "read" on my post that shows that you really are there and don't care about recovery and addiction don't forget to comment, like and share my post of "addiction" get the word out of this group and got your friends of any sort of addiction. sorry if this sounds like a whole bunch of jibber jabber ish but it is all talk to speech things to my phone. 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